Relatable Entertainment

It’s late and I can’t sleep again. Mostly because on nights like this, nights before I make a video the creative side of my brain is on fire. No matter how hard I try to put it out, it doesnt seem to work well. 

Don't get me wrong, I welcome this side more than anything in the world but...dang it why do all my good ideas have to come up when I am trying to sleep!

So I am in my kitchen, just finished up some cookies and I doodled a little in my planner. 

My video is going to be on why I am making videos. I will post it here as well.

And because sometimes when I talk I get excited or distracted I figured maybe I will type out my thought process and get them out of my head so I can sleep and not get anxious. Because, well thats a thing and maybe another topic for a video. 

No one has really asked me the question “Why are you making videos” but, call me a mind reader because I am sure some people wonder why I am doing it. Especially since most of the people who watch my videos know me and know that I am not the most outgoing, brave person in the world. 

I am not the type of person that likes to get invited to things, large crowds freak me out and I have an annoying tendency to want everyone to like me. 

So why not start a Youtube channel...HA-ha. 

But seriously, it really started when I started browsing on youtube like maybe 9-10 years ago. 

Back then I wasn't a great internet browser, I barely did anything on Facebook. It was just after the Myspace craze started dying down and everyone was getting involved with Facebook. Wasn't there a time that Facebook was just for college students? 

Anyways, I don't even know how I stumbled onto youtube… I think I was trying to find a song or something and google led me that way. Strange to think about how you started going on a website… But this is important to this story. 

I don't remember how I got started watching youtube things but I know when and why. 

It was during the time of my life I consider to be wasted years. Seems like a lifetime ago but I was in a long term relationship with someone who didn't seem to like me most of the time. He wanted to change literally everything about me….again thats another topic for maybe another video….Ha. 

I just moved in with him and he often just left me home alone a lot while he hung out with his friends. This was just before Netflix was popular, so I didn't have a lot to do. I cleaned a lot. When I didn't have anything to clean I would watch videos or try to find computer games. 

One day I stumbled upon a youtube channel where the guy was talking about Silly bands (Remember those dumb things) Turns out this Youtuber made it his goal to video everyday of his life for a year. Which then turned into now 13 years of vlogging everyday.

Who would want to watch that….

Me...I watched that. I spent hours catching up on his 10 minute videos from the months I have missed like it was a show. I needed to know more about this person who I will probably never meet (However in 2018 I did see him at warp tour! LOL) 

And I think what drew me in and held my attention was, he was a real life person with real life things. It was relatable. There wasn't much he did that I couldn’t go out and do. So even though at the time I was a prisoner at my own house I was able to live life through him. I watched him move to different apartments, then to a house that he bought, I watched him get married, divorced and married again. I watched him announce his baby girl and I still watch him and his family today. 

The internet is packed full of people who are so fake its annoying. Instagram people who post pictures of themselves that literally takes hours to conduct. People who know how to angle themselves to make them look like a completely different person. People who make you feel like you are failing at life….Those people are toxic in my opinion and I do not want to be like them. 

I want to be like The Trippy Family. I want to share my life with people and learn things on the way. Maybe they will learn something too. 

But I hope that someday someone will get inspired to follow their dreams because of something I do or say. 

Because see, it wasn't just about “oh I can do that, I can film my life and get views” Its more of my way of paying it forward. 

In my bad relationship that lasted way longer than it should have because I was stubborn, I thought that was it. My life was just going to be me watching youtube bored out of my mind, go to work come home and not even want to talk to my “significant other” 

But when I started seeing these people deal with real life problems, like divorce...and then they found happiness again and it was true and amazing….That made me realize...What...am...I..DOING! 

Sometimes you need a person outside the situation, no matter how far outside….to help you see what you probably already knew. 

So now I have a life worth recording. I have a wonderful family, I have a great life...not perfect….not impossible, but great. Maybe there is a hopeless 20 year old out there that has anxiety and doesn’t know how to do things...maybe they will take something from my videos. Maybe I will make them smile and make them push themselves to do better so they can be a cool youtuber too. 

Thats the goal anyways.