PBJ

Good almost afternoon!

I eat my lunch at 11:00 at work so it's my lunch time and I felt like I should write a post.

Nothing earth shattering but just a nice little thought I think you would enjoy reading.

So those who know me personally know that I'm a bit of anxiety spaz.

I don't want to say I have anxiety because i have never seen a doctor to tell me this. 

But I know I stress over the dumbest things and sometimes the thoughts prevent me from doing new things. 

Which was one of my fears of becoming a mom. I know a lot of people think "am I good enough" and that doesn't make me any different but sometimes I worry about things other people don't think about.

Like I'm sure a lot of moms worry about if the carseat is in the car correctly or that they are doing everything right when it comes to feeding and caring for their babies. Even making sure they have the right pacifier seems to be a struggle for some mom's to be.

Now these are all thoughts I also have do don't think that I am just like whatever about it. But to me these cross my mind once in a while...

What had been bothering me (I use the term bother lightly here) is... 

You ready?

I don't think you are ready.

This will make you chuckle so get ready.

I am worried I won't be a good mom because I am not very good at making peanut butter jelly sandwiches.

I know right 

Who thinks of this nonsense?

Me.

Why?

I don't know I got it in my head a long time ago that my mom makes better peanut butter jelly sandwiches then I do so that makes her a good mom. 

So i can't say I crave peanut butter and jelly sandwiches but I am pretty happy when I am eating them. So I have been making them for my lunch most days. 

And I keep trying to get the proportions right and I either have to much peanut butter and not enough jelly or the other way around.

It's ridiculous.

Don't get me wrong they are still yummy but I think of the future if I make a sandwich for Alice if it will be good or if she will complain to the other kids that her money "sucks at making lunches"

Again... I am well aware i sound crazy.  And I am getting to my point...

.

So this morning I was running late because well Tuesdays are hard for me to leave the house on time because my husband is usually home so I really dont want to go to work. 

So as I'm struggling to get ready for work I was running out of time to get my lunch. I figured I'd probably just grab a can of raviolis and get wicked heart burn later. I didn't have time to do all the things and make my sandwich. 

Of course my husband saves the day as he usually does and he made me my peanut butter and jelly sandwich. 

Seriously I hit the lottery with this guy 

As I sit down for my lunch I smile at all the goodies he put in my lunch bag for me to eat.

It resembles something I would have eaten in middle school...

Sandwich, fruit roll up, Capri sun and to make it "healthy" I have an apple and a few types of granola bars. 

But the sandwich... Perfect amount of peanut butter and jelly mushed in the bread of numminess. 

This is the good part of the post...

I might not make the best lunches... But I will show up in other ways for Alice.

And the ways that I fall short.... Like making the perfect peanut butter and jelly sandwich for example is where her Dad will make up for. 

We are going to be great parents because we are a great team. And that makes all the other worries fade away. 

Sometimes I start to worry again. But Chris keeps me on track.

Alice is going to have so much love and the best peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.